Casey Stengel

At the end of the 1960 season, Casey Stengel was fired. He has been famously quoted as saying that he would never make the mistake of being too old again.
That being said, Jack McKeon's 16th major league managing season begins now. He's played with Kansas City, Oakland, Florida, Cincinnati, and San Diego. Now, he's back with Florida. Since May 27th, the Marlins have won 3 times. Since June 10th, they haven't won. Theoretically, there's no Josh Johnson, but they weren't really winning for him. There's Anibal Sanchez, but they can't win for him either. The other teams wait until he leaves, and then they pound on the relievers.
And with signing an 80-year old man to the helm (shouldn't we be worried about Florida managers in the same way we were worried about John McCain keeling over and dying if he was president?), there's nothing to lose. Florida is bad. Not Houston bad... YET, but it's going to happen. Florida sucks. The offense is anemic. The bullpen is "nicht so gut." The pitching staff is pretty much non-existent.
Mike Stanton hits home runs, but... Mike Stanton strikes out at least 1 time per game (almost once every 3 at bats).
Gaby Sanchez is .304 with 12 home runs, but what does it matter if it's for a losing cause?
Anibal Sanchez has an ERA under 3.00, but as I said, if he can't pitch complete games and get 3 runs from his team, what good does it do.
So that said, if Jack McKeon is the new Casey Stengel, who is Marv Throneberry? Who is Choo Choo Coleman? Sure, there's Don Zimmer and Richie Ashburn (that said, Ashburn hit .306, but don Zimmer made Dan Uggla seem like Rogers Hornsby with a .077 average), but this was 1962. They weren't exactly who we remember them to be today. That's why they were 40-120-1.
And it's highly probable that the Marlins will win 8 more games and best the 1962 Mets, but are they really that much better (especially in light of hospitalization)?
So if they want to give the reins to McKeon... good luck and enjoy the ride.

Roy Halladay

Philadelphia has long been known for its doctors. There was Dr. J and his sweet 70s afro flying through the sky for slam dunks with style and class. There was Bill Cosby delivering babies and proving that the African American place was wherever their talents and drive could take them. The University of Penn and Temple both have famous doctoral schools and churn out lots of great medical professionals, but no doctor in the city of Philadelphia is quite as famous as Doc Halladay (and while he may not win 30 games like The Baseball Project predicts, he could come very close).

Yesterday, he was sitting down Padres like a defrocking convention gone haywire. All in all, he had 14 friars getting irate in the dugout by the end of the 8th inning, but then, he blew the 2 hit shutout in the 9th inning with 3 more hits, and so in came Antonio Bastardo to seal the deal on the Phillies first home sweep of the Padres since 1979 and the days of Ozzie Smith.

This was a perfect comeback after the debacle against Milwaulkee (6.2 innings, 6 earned, 3 whiffs), but it doesn't disguise the hatred that I feel for Philadelphia's announcers (for their partisan nature and dullness) since the days of Harry Kalas shufflinging off this mortal coil. However, yesterday was about watching a game, so it's not like I really cared who was commentating, but when I have to listen to the backpedaling after "innings counts don't matter" and then going into "he's getting a lot of innings" after hearing "he's going to want to finish this game," I just want to vomit.

I'm from the Nolan Ryan school of pitching. Three runs in 6 innings is not a quality start. I'm for guys finishing their games and leaving losers like Dan Wheeler in the breadline or forcing him to find a real job (instead of being the designated innings eater whipping boy, which I'm sure every team needs, but still... I could do that job for far less money). I'm for removing the role of all closers except consistent ones (something that Mariano Rivera has been faltering on lately with his second blown save of the year on Sunday). Even then, I'm for bringing them in when the door needs slammed shut. I'm for multiple innings saves. Giving Bastardo a 1 pitch save for inducing an out... bullshit (in the words of Matthew McConaughey to Kate Hudson - when she wasn't ruining herself being A-Rod's non-Madonna arm candy - then again, with her track record of men, she's not exactly a prize herself).

Nevertheless, if there is no limit to pitches - especially in light of finishing a gem of a game (and I heard this same line with Josh Johnson and Anibal Sanchez's no hitter flirtations), then they should do the deed or lose it all.

Yesterday, the good folks at MLBTV (the baseball fetishist's porn without nipples network) showed game 7 of the 1992 NLCS - Pirates against Braves... the beginning of all that was Atlanta and Barry Bond's stake through the heart to Andy Van Slyke and the rest of the Pittsburgh faithful (no winning seasons in almost 20 years). Drabek gets to the 9th and is dealing, but then the wheels come off. It's a pitcher refusing to let the ball free and doing what it takes to win or lose on his shoulders because he got the team here, and goll dang it... he's reveling in the glory or sulking in defeat. One misplayed ball later, Sid Bream comes home on a single to Bonds, and despite all those surgeries, he's under the glove, and that's it.

But that's a pitcher letting it all hang out.

It's Pedro in 2003 with Grady Little not demanding the ball. If you don't demand it, you have to give in to the pitcher's ego.

And if it's Halladay, there's an ego. One run in with two on in the ninth - to pull the ball is to disrespect your workhorse. Let him win it or lose it. He's got the stuff... even if he's tiring out - or don't bring him out for the 9th. You (Charlie Manuel) are the one who left him hit... now you're the one that should leave him pitch.

But all the same... creating adorable little Muppets that get yanked after 6 innings and therapy headcases that need to be reassured that they're ok even when they're not (Brad Lidge) just shows how far we've come from tough pitchers to move into a world of pampered athletes.

Jarrod Saltalamacchia

Randal from Clerks said it best about it being "so good to be right. There's nothing more exhilarating than pointing out the shortcomings of others, is there? (especially Terry Francona, Theo Epstein, and the rest of the Boston management that has the Red Sox in this predicament), and as Jarrod Saltalamacchia finds himself demoted (can the soup line be far behind, and if it is, do you get a hat like that with it?), we have to wonder... how long until Theo and Terry find themselves deported from Red Sox Nation to the fumaroles of Antarctica?
So in honor of the general suckiness of the former Red Sox catcher, let us take a look at who in the world of bat and ball (to include women's softball) is having a better day than Jarrod Saltalamacchia (.194 and 5 RBIs).
It's too bad that Buster Posey's little sister Samantha, a Valdosta State product, can't catch in the bigs... she just walloped the home run cycle (solo, 1 run, 2 run, grand slam) in a double header. Yep... power like that tops a average.
The Blue Jays came back against Mariano Rivera. I may have lost fantasy points, but I'll take it for that. Any time you beat the best closer in the game, it's a good feeling.
If you're the Brew Crew, you're happy today after beating up on Roy Halladay and playing competitive with Cliff Lee in a potential warm up battle for the playoffs to come.
If you're Pablo Sandoval, you're happy because you aren't on the bench and half way through April, you have 5 jacks (8 short of last year's disappointing total - when he truly was a Kung Fu Panda, but not anymore). Seeing as he basically lost my 5-year old nephew in weight from his tubby body (not that I'm one to talk about tubby bodies, but I'm not a star athlete either), he's back to being productively sick on the base paths.
If you're Jerry Sands, you're happy to be called up and playing for the Los Angeles Dodgers and even happier as your first 2 games result in a 2 game-hitting streak with 2 RBIs. That's 40% of Jarrod Saltalamacchia's season total, and fortunately, nobody is counting on Sands to throw out runners or tame the savage Wacky Lackey.
If you're Josh Johnson, you're happy to be facing Pittsburgh and shutting them down for 7 innings on 9 whiffs as you win again and continue to be the most dominant pitcher of the month - at least in the other league of Dan Haren.
If you're Ubaldo Jimenez, at least you're happy to be back - even if you still lost the game. Playing is better than sitting on the bench any day.
And for that, April may be T.S. Eliot's cruelest month, and this day one of its most heinous days of all (up there with the 14th for the death of Lincoln and the Titanic - today being Hitler's birthday and Columbine), but for some (Matt Kemp), April is the time to start off with a statistical bang.
For the embattled Boston Red Sox, it's like Monday's 105th anniversary of the great San Francisco Fire. The world is collapsing everywhere and there's nothing we can do. When can the rebuilding come? What must we sacrifice to do it? How long can we wait for the next chance for a World Series victory? Will this wait bring back chants of 1918 - if 1918 can even be called a real victory in light of Eddie Cicotte's comments... or should we just let the vague notes of a historic cheat burn on the fire for what they are or they aren't?
Yes... April has so much potential (my wife and sister's birthday), but it has so much sadness (Waco and Oklahoma City, whose anniversaries of mass carnage was yesterday).
Somewhere between the rain and the sunshine, there are flowers growing and beauty abounds, but alas... we can only wonder what else is to come.

Greg Anderson

In another world, we'd be celebrating Josh Johnson's no hitter this morning, but he came up 5 outs short, and the reality is that if it didn't happen, so be it. And more importantly, we have the train wreck that is the Barry Bonds show trial.
And so if you're the feds today, you have to be wondering if it was really a victory to spend YEARS AND YEARS of your life chasing down Barry Bonds for steroids and other performance enhancing clear and cream drugs. And why wouldn't you? The trial that should have been slam dunk ended in a mistrial and we can spend tons of time trying to figure out why, but that's really not worth the time because Barry will walk into obscurity and hatred, and perhaps, some of it is unfair, and perhaps, some of it was brought on himself, but in the end, a sure-fire Hall of Famer isn't in there. To this, maybe there needs to be a wing across the street from Cooperstown that allows once great tarnished players to get their props from the fans who want to see them. And maybe there, the light will be just a little bit less glowing, but all the same, we can see Bonds, Clemens, Shoeless Joe, Pete Rose, and Mark McGwire for their part in the greatness of an era - even if it was all just smoke and mirrors to the latter day saints troop led by Bob Costas.
According to the good folks at ESPN:
The final votes were 8-4 to acquit Bonds of lying about steroids and 9-3 to acquit him on lying about HGH use. The panel voted 11-1 to convict him of getting an injection from someone other than his doctor, with one woman holding out.
And if you're the feds, you have to be wondering, why try Roger Clemens? Why waste the time and the money? Is he any less guilty than Bonds, and haven't we already seen the partisan shift with him one time (as the conservatives in Congress lined up behind him while the liberals attacked him viciously)? How far will his money and his fame and his ability to clearly act innocent (if not a little enraged) on camera go?
And so if Bonds isn't guilty, then we might have 2 men completely out of baseball and the Hall of Fame, but just like 8 other guys who are out of baseball and weren't guilty in court... the real sentence has already been handed down - and it wasn't at a show trial.
And really, why? Do we just believe that 1 person clearly wasn't in some way prejudiced against the evidence to decide that Bonds NEVER EVER got an injection from Greg Anderson who was released from jail after being thrown back in the hole AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN for not testifying and not complying with federal orders?
Which makes us wonder... if Barry Bonds isn't celebrating today (and I wouldn't know why he isn't - his goose was pretty much cooked before he hit the trial, and he got a sentence that will give him probation and no jail time, and even if that means no Hall of Fame, he wasn't getting in anyway... at least since what happened after 1998), what present will he be giving to Greg Anderson for being a "good ol' boy" all of these years?
I suspect it will be a really nice one.

Alex Rodriguez

How 'bout them Butler Bulldogs?!!
But alas, since this isn't an NCAA basketball blog, we'll stick with the world of baseball and get right back to that.
There's pretty much not anything nice that we can say about Alex Rodriguez here, so if we have to say that we avoided him in YET ANOTHER fantasy draft, that's really not news, but to actually see him doing something nice - invite a 12-year old girl named Julianne Ramirez to a Yankee game because she rescued a 3-year old family friend by using CPR chest compressions - we have to look at the good things that a baseball player can do. Of course, there are other things a baseball player can do - get pissy when he and his movie star girlfriend are on camera in their Super Bowl sky booth or to come up positive for steroids and try to deny it and pass the blame - but alas, Rodriguez and his team killing salary (at least in the Rangers years) did something right this time, and since it's the only time we'll say it all year....
We'll say it.
And we'll take a look at who I did draft in the second of my fantasy drafts. I did draft Yankees, which as I said before is about the nature of this game - not my support for the Evil Empire. I ended up with Mariano Rivera, Robinson Cano, and Brett Gardner. Then again, I also got Roy Halladay and Cliff Lee again. They'll play alongside Nelson Cruz, Ichiro, and Buster Posey as well as Ryan Zimmerman, Jose Bautista, Dan Haren, and Andrew McCutchen (I've got him on both teams as I figure that he'll try to play his way out of Pittsburgh this July). Josh Johnson and Joakim Soria are also on the team, so we're primed and ready for action.
As is Colby Rasmus, who I had another trade request from the same guy who must either worship Rasmus as a god, or he must really know something.
All the same... I'm ready for Thursday and the start of the season.
Let the games begin!