Wilson Betemit

St. Louis continues to face dark skies, and we know that when you're getting rained (or urinated) on, it tends to pour. Wainwright. Carpenter. Holliday. Being cursed to have to deal with Tony Larussa on a day in day out basis...
Yep... and now it's this line straight from ESPN about Albert...
"a non-displaced fracture of his left radius and his arm is in a splint."
Of all the things that we never thought we would have to do in life (wear an A-Rod jersey, watch My Big Fat Greek Wedding + 8 Mile, sit through an entire episode of the Kardashians, or ever have to relive the junior high school years after getting sucked into a horrible nightmare of a wayback machine moment), it seems that we now have to write about his assailant: Wilson Betemit.
Let it be known that it's only because he's now officially the dirtbag who took out Albert Pujols' and his ability to go .300, 30, 100, and 100 this year (he came up 1 run short of this only once in his 10 year career, but thanks to nobody loser Bettamit, it's going to happen since he's .279, 17, 52, and 49 this year).
We are not impressed.
Just like with his 8 year career that has him at shades above .260 and less than 60 jacks and no speed to speak of, Betemit is a person in need of a career shift - even if he's hitting .287 in 188 at bats for perennial cellar dwellers Kansas City.
Thus, for ruining Albert Pujols' 2011, we want to wish him some or all of these 10 things that somehow won't affect our karma.
1. A trip to the Gulf of Aden.
2. A job cleaning up after a New York Republican representative.
3. Teaching Megan Fox about World War Two in order to increase her chances of ever working in Hollywood again.
4. Getting to screen Shaq's newest career move.
5. A free course with Dale Carnegie.
6. The A-Rod run to first base course.
7. The chance to throw a luncheon for NFL owners and players.
8. A chance for a new career with a name that will completely fit him.
9. Being the guy who creates and cleans up after Justin Bieber's parties.
10. Helping others to overcome their inappropriately chosen words. Kind of like...
"I was running hard and the ball arrived at the same time I got to the base. I couldn't do anything about it. He hit me on my left arm, that's why he dropped the ball. I hit him and then I saw him on the ground. That's part of the game. I couldn't do anything about it."

Milton Bradley

At the end of the day, it's all about being productive, and what better way to be productive than to celebrate the 27th anniversary of a game that was played for 25 innings (just over 8 hours)? Thank you Harold Baines for wrapping that one up (while not the longest ever by innings - Boston and Brooklyn battled to a 1-1 tie after 26 innings in 1920 - it was the longest by time). And with that, here's to baseball history, present, and future.
So let's see who's being productive at the end of the 5th week of baseball 2011...
(definitely not my fantasy team who lost for the first time all year in head to head games).
Derek Jeter lost his power, and then he got it back with 2 home runs in one day after not hitting one in his previous 256 at bats. Is this the end, or is this Jeter bouncing back to glory? He did have 4 hits and a stolen base to go up to a .276 average, so that has to be something.
HOWEVER, not everyone had a good day on Sunday. Take Kobe Bryant and Phil Jackson, who were swept out of the playoffs... not that we care, but that said, it's great to see the NBA's Ben Roethlisberger getting sent home early with his little Zen buddy and the Kardashian circus tag along getting sent back for siesta in most unceremoneous ways. No offense to Phil and Lamar, but when it comes to those who commit sexual assault (and only get out of it by using their fame against their accuser), they should all go drown.
But alas, that's just me.
All the same, today is the end of the road for yet another Milton Bradley adventure. While he did just get ejected against Boston not 2 weeks ago, it wasn't his attitude, but it was his bat failing to live up to its potential that sees Bradley getting ready to tread the unemployment lines of baseball as he faces outright release or trade due to being put up for assignment. Batting .218 with 2 home runs and 13 RBIs will do that to a man.
Thus, in honor of the man with the most unfortunate name in baseball (even worse than Coco Crisp since that's at least a fun name, and apparently, it's not the kind of name that inspires a player to go loco), there are the many problems of Milton Bradley: bottle throwing at fans who litter the field around him, accusing teammates of racism, accusing fans who hate his foul attitude of racism for sending him hate mail, screaming at teammates, screaming at managers, and trying to scream at announcers. Yep... he's done the whole spectrum... from umpires to oppoents, there is a world out there that hates Milton, and frankly, there's no internal locus of control to make sense of it all.
While not always his fault, it's all about how a man walks the walk after hearing the talk, and unfortunately, for this, Bradley's potential has been cut short.
We'll see if he comes back, but until then...

Brian Stow

Friendship, Pennsylvania, is probably a really nice town, but I've never been there. However, if their citizens are like 41 year old Scott Ashley, I have to say that I'll pass. In a video that is almost as nauseating as watching a Kardashian breed in digital format, you can watch him get tasered for unruly conduct in a game last night against the Rockies.

Thank God for Youtube.

After drunkenly antagonizing fans in his section, he was asked to leave, which didn't work, and then he was hit with a night club 6 times, which didn't work, and then he was tasered. The Pirates support the 2 officers who feared for their safety, and yeah... it was a typical night in Pittsburgh - only Ben Roethlisberger wasn't getting too agressive for his own good this time.

That said, going into the atmosphere of removing a drunken fan and having to deal with the abuse of other drunken police hating fans isn't easy. I know that it's part of the job, but there is something to not be said about this "don't tread on me" attitude that is escalated when idiot fans feel that just paying for their ticket entitles them to stay the course of the game and do whatever, whenever, to whoever.

And that just isn't so.

In light of Brian Stow, a San Francisco Giants fan who had the tar kicked out of him after a game against the Los Angeles Dodgers for simply wearing the wrong jersey in another team's stadium, there is no more mulligans for bad behavior. Stow is in a coma and has had part of his skull removed to stop some of the pain that he is in. If you want to donate to help him, you can see links in the actual article. At the current time, there is a $150,000 reward if you can turn in information leading to identities of the thugs that did this heinous act to him.

And for all that we do and say about team loyalty and general feistiness during games - razzing those who support other teams or talking trash - there is still a sense of when enough is enough OR at least a line that won't be crossed (verbal against the team to physical against the fan).

But when we don't know the difference and our loyalties are for grandfalloons that we choose to see as ourselves - even when we're not even near good enough to make A level minor league teams... then something is amiss, and for that, there has to be a call to rationality again.

Either that, or people can just leave the games and go to a roadhouse where this stuff is expected and condoned - unless Patrick Swayze has something to say about it.