What would baseball be without Barry Bonds? Ken Burns seems to think that extended sections of the 10th Inning should belong to him and his father, who personally thanks Mark Reynolds every day of his afterlife as he no longer stands as the biggest whiff threat in baseball history.
Well, here we go... the perjury trial is for real. The man with 73 home runs in a season and 762 for his career is officially facing 5 counts against him (instead of 11).
He still says that he's innocent, but so does Roger Clemens, and we all know how that's working out for him. So for Bonds, the big day is March 1st, which is when he gets arraigned for perjury. Greg Anderson, his former trainer and bestest buddy who never testified against him, will most likely get more contempt of court charges for continued refusal to talk (we have to wonder how much money that is translating to in thank yous from Barry). That said, Jason Giambi and more unknown former major leaguers are going to state that Anderson hooked them up with steroids in the same way it's alleged that Anderson gave Bonds the Clear and the Cream.
For Clemens, his next date with destiny is March 14th when his subpoena for the notes from the House committee that investigated Andy Pettite, Brian McNamee, Chuck Knoblauch, and Jose Canseco (because where there is juice, there is the Typhoid Mary of Steroids) is analyzed for whether they'll give up the documents or not.
Nevertheless, the issue here isn't whether these guys are guilty. Let's be honest, guilty or not, their entire careers are trash. Neither guy is taking his accumulation of some of the greatest numbers ever into Cooperstown. Neither guy is ever going to truly accrue fans or love - despite the fact that Roger was still able to find time to joke about throwing a broken bat at Mike Piazza when he performed for charity. In this, I'm just curious who thinks that inviting Roger to raise money is really the way they want to go with an event of this status, but with that said, I'm sure it got a couple of chuckles and guffaws.
So alas, the 2 biggest names in the Mitchell Commission hearing are going to be facing justice - even if it's only to show them that they can't fight authority because as John Cougar Mellencamp once sang, "Authority always wins." In the end, the 2 of them will go down like the Titanic and without the chance of getting saved that rescued Willie Mays and Mickey Mantle from their baseball exorcisms. There is no life preserver like the one that was thrown to Ty Cobb, Tris Speaker, and Smoky Joe Wood. It's over.
There's no nostalgic love like that for Pete Rose and Joe Jackson. It's done.
And that's what's at issue here. Roger Clemens and Barry Bonds have done nothing to make people love them. Jeff Pearlman's Love Me Hate Me Barry Bonds and American Icon by Teri Thompson and others truly sum up how ugly and loath-able these once great athletes are. The lies and deceptions of Barry Bonds and his myriad of lives that don't remember what each other did while quietly countering his villainy with charity. The betrayal of Roger's wife and best friend to save his records in light of the accusations that were leveled at him.
And while these guys fight for their lives and their backsides not to be made entertainment in the federal prison system, there is something out there that wonders what will became of baseball and the rest of the accused steroids users in baseball. Who else is on the list of anonymous players from 2004? Who else will be named when the witch hunt continues? Who will the next test failure be? Do we really want to know?
I really have to say that I don't.
There needs to be at least a few good memories left of all that is good and pure of the game that I love.
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Friday, February 11, 2011
Mark Buehrle
And so the news states that Mark Buehrle and his wife Jamie wished injury to Michael Vick last season in his comeback in Philadelphia. To this, we ask: who didn't?
OK, so there was Obama calling to congratulate Eagles owner Jeffrey Lurie because he gave Vick a second chance (as opposed to calling the mother of a slain U.S. soldier named Sean Collins whose death notice letter was botched up). Now, we're not calling for the death penalty for Vick (we'll leave that to Tucker Carlson), but let's just say that if it wasn't for the karma effects, we'd be wishing constant ill to Michael Vick.
The issue of animal rights is a touchy one, and we're not vegetarian as some would claim one would need to be to defend animal rights and not be hypocritical, but in looking at brutal thug like behavior, even people who hunt, ranch, or shop in the meat department at Wal Mart can pretty much all get together and say that what they see is wrong and vicious blood lust is just uncalled for.
Now, I'm not quite sure why the Buehrle's statement is news. Perhaps, the media seeks to paint their whiteness as racist and wanting to go against the second chance atmosphere of America that is opening up to wanting to pay big time cash for Vick's autograph again (not me; I passed on that stuff when I went to my last baseball card show in December). Perhaps, they want this architect of a perfect game a few short years ago to be seen as vindictive above and beyond the call of duty. No matter what, let's just say that what they do for injured dogs shows their kindness and generosity while Vick remains, Vick... released from prison, shown that he can't do whatever he wants, and humbled a little bit as his whole financial world was crumbled as a result of his thinking he owned the world.
And perhaps this is another key difference in baseball and football. Sure, there's a sense of entitlement to hoochies and strippers in all fields of endeavor that cater to male star power. So it goes. However, the unchecked aggression that exists in football tends to permeate out of the game and into real life. This isn't about a sport where Pete Rose slides into home to win a game; this is a sport that created OJ Simpson.
And this isn't meant to knock football, but rather it is written to say that as humans, we have a certain responsibility. We'd say the same thing if Chipper Jones was impregnating a Hooters girl despite being "happily" married, which he did. Uncool. Don't be an asshole. Don't needlessly hurt anything. That's just part of being a human. And when you're done, do your part to make up for being a scumbag. Expect people to dis you for what you did. Don't ever expect people to forget - even if you've gotten better. Roberto Alomar and Juan Marichal would agree that this happens.
I know it's not fair, but it is what it is. You were given millions to be a hero and a role model - no matter what Willie Wilson thinks the job should entail. Act like one.
As George Orwell would say, "A sahib has to act like a sahib."
OK, so there was Obama calling to congratulate Eagles owner Jeffrey Lurie because he gave Vick a second chance (as opposed to calling the mother of a slain U.S. soldier named Sean Collins whose death notice letter was botched up). Now, we're not calling for the death penalty for Vick (we'll leave that to Tucker Carlson), but let's just say that if it wasn't for the karma effects, we'd be wishing constant ill to Michael Vick.
The issue of animal rights is a touchy one, and we're not vegetarian as some would claim one would need to be to defend animal rights and not be hypocritical, but in looking at brutal thug like behavior, even people who hunt, ranch, or shop in the meat department at Wal Mart can pretty much all get together and say that what they see is wrong and vicious blood lust is just uncalled for.
Now, I'm not quite sure why the Buehrle's statement is news. Perhaps, the media seeks to paint their whiteness as racist and wanting to go against the second chance atmosphere of America that is opening up to wanting to pay big time cash for Vick's autograph again (not me; I passed on that stuff when I went to my last baseball card show in December). Perhaps, they want this architect of a perfect game a few short years ago to be seen as vindictive above and beyond the call of duty. No matter what, let's just say that what they do for injured dogs shows their kindness and generosity while Vick remains, Vick... released from prison, shown that he can't do whatever he wants, and humbled a little bit as his whole financial world was crumbled as a result of his thinking he owned the world.
And perhaps this is another key difference in baseball and football. Sure, there's a sense of entitlement to hoochies and strippers in all fields of endeavor that cater to male star power. So it goes. However, the unchecked aggression that exists in football tends to permeate out of the game and into real life. This isn't about a sport where Pete Rose slides into home to win a game; this is a sport that created OJ Simpson.
And this isn't meant to knock football, but rather it is written to say that as humans, we have a certain responsibility. We'd say the same thing if Chipper Jones was impregnating a Hooters girl despite being "happily" married, which he did. Uncool. Don't be an asshole. Don't needlessly hurt anything. That's just part of being a human. And when you're done, do your part to make up for being a scumbag. Expect people to dis you for what you did. Don't ever expect people to forget - even if you've gotten better. Roberto Alomar and Juan Marichal would agree that this happens.
I know it's not fair, but it is what it is. You were given millions to be a hero and a role model - no matter what Willie Wilson thinks the job should entail. Act like one.
As George Orwell would say, "A sahib has to act like a sahib."
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Adrian Gonzalez
For the past few years, we have been inundated with discussion on the trade possibility of Adrian Gonzalez who seemed to have a ton of upside since he was allegedly playing in a park as big as the one that Willie Mays yanked Vic Wertz's flyball out of the sky in, but let's be honest 396 to center is not 483 feet, but then again, Fenway is a more intimate affair, so that's a plus for his statistics now that the trade is in the books, the hope is in the fans, and the man is in full PR mode.
So the great white hope pulled a .298, 31, 101 line last year knowing that what he did was going to help both the Padres win the division (of course, they imploded in the last few weeks, which was still a feat considering that other than Gonzalez and pitching, they really didn't have much last year) and help himself win a contract with another team.
So let's be honest with that line... there are 2 years in his career with more home runs (he did hit 40 once) and he did bat 300 once (304), but we're looking at good value (under $5million) for what seems to be about $15million of production in baseball money (which is less real than the leprechauns dancing under rainbows, Sasquatch sightings, and Loch Ness Monster pictures).
His whiffs are down a little bit, but he's not getting 600 at bats (almost, but not quite) either like he was in those 140 K years.
In his year in the playoffs, he was 5 for 14, so that bears well, but can he handle the Boston media? San Diego is a friendly town that isn't quite so media "intense" as Boston. How will he react to the big games against the Yankees? Can he meet expectations?
Gonzalez now stands on first base and moves Youkilis to third, which moves Mike Lowell to improving his golf game. Back in the day, Mike Lowell was a hero (as recently as the 2007 World Series), but then he got old, and the Red Sox wanted to jettison him to anyone who would have his memories as modern hopes, but the physicals that he took to reveal the damage of a career in baseball kept him and his salary in Boston. He hobbled through, a warrior to the end in spite of Theo Epstein's business approach to baseball in Boston (the same thing that sent famed Idiot Kevin Millar packing instead of making him a bench coach). The same approach that allows Jason Varitek's memories to stay at a discount for another year instead of making him a bench coach. The same approach that broke Dave Roberts' heart when it brought it to Boston just long enough to steal the base that made him as heroic as Paul Revere only to spit on it by sending him away the next year. If there's not enough hate for Theo Epstein here, give me some time. I'll get to all of the reasons why he and Francona need to go - in spite of what they did for 2004 and 2007. There's a year; it will all come out in the wash.
Baseball in Boston (and St. Louis, for that matter) is a beautiful thing; however, I don't have to like the whole team, and I especially don't have to like the team's management.
So the great white hope pulled a .298, 31, 101 line last year knowing that what he did was going to help both the Padres win the division (of course, they imploded in the last few weeks, which was still a feat considering that other than Gonzalez and pitching, they really didn't have much last year) and help himself win a contract with another team.
So let's be honest with that line... there are 2 years in his career with more home runs (he did hit 40 once) and he did bat 300 once (304), but we're looking at good value (under $5million) for what seems to be about $15million of production in baseball money (which is less real than the leprechauns dancing under rainbows, Sasquatch sightings, and Loch Ness Monster pictures).
His whiffs are down a little bit, but he's not getting 600 at bats (almost, but not quite) either like he was in those 140 K years.
In his year in the playoffs, he was 5 for 14, so that bears well, but can he handle the Boston media? San Diego is a friendly town that isn't quite so media "intense" as Boston. How will he react to the big games against the Yankees? Can he meet expectations?
Gonzalez now stands on first base and moves Youkilis to third, which moves Mike Lowell to improving his golf game. Back in the day, Mike Lowell was a hero (as recently as the 2007 World Series), but then he got old, and the Red Sox wanted to jettison him to anyone who would have his memories as modern hopes, but the physicals that he took to reveal the damage of a career in baseball kept him and his salary in Boston. He hobbled through, a warrior to the end in spite of Theo Epstein's business approach to baseball in Boston (the same thing that sent famed Idiot Kevin Millar packing instead of making him a bench coach). The same approach that allows Jason Varitek's memories to stay at a discount for another year instead of making him a bench coach. The same approach that broke Dave Roberts' heart when it brought it to Boston just long enough to steal the base that made him as heroic as Paul Revere only to spit on it by sending him away the next year. If there's not enough hate for Theo Epstein here, give me some time. I'll get to all of the reasons why he and Francona need to go - in spite of what they did for 2004 and 2007. There's a year; it will all come out in the wash.
Baseball in Boston (and St. Louis, for that matter) is a beautiful thing; however, I don't have to like the whole team, and I especially don't have to like the team's management.
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Ross Ohlendorf
I've said before; I'll say it again. There is no way that baseball money is real. As I continue to look for gainful PART TIME employment to contemplate my 3/4 time employment in the educational world, I see that Ross Ohlendorf's win loss record is truly as deceptive as... well, not quite Nolan Ryan difference, but let's say better than league average as he floats with a 4.05 ERA in his role of the King of non-support.
To think that a pitcher who is 1-11 can get a nearly $2million raise from roughly league minimum ($435,000) to just over $2million is quite a dream and it would definitely make Horatio Alger proud. However, in a celebration of getting one over on Pittsburgh with a little help from the arbitration team, we take a look at some other great losers who got to hang out a little longer due to the tangible things that aren't told by a win loss record.
Hall of Famer Steve Carlton in 1973 went 13-20 for the Phillies. Phil Neikro fared a little better in 1979 as he won 21 for Atlanta while losing 20.
Mike Maroth may have lost 20 for the 2003 Tigers, but his 9 wins were more than 20% of his teams 43 TOTAL wins. This does a lot to stop the bleeding (or at least provide a healthy dose of morphine) for a team that pretty much stank up the whole place until they convinced Ivan Rodriguez that a lot of money can rebuild a team, which is true because it took the Tigers from last in 03 to the World Series losers in 06.
Prior to that, in 1980, Brian Kingman was 8-20 for an Oakland team that wasn't that bad (they had a winning record), but they just couldn't win for Kingman who posted a sub 4 ERA in spite of the lack of love he was shown from his teammates.
Denny McClain was the last 30 game winner (31) in 1968 and led the league in wins the following year, but by 1971, he was washed up when he got his 20 losses.
Louis Tiant was a 20 game loser in 1969, but he became a dominant force for Boston a few years later. Everyone forgot that Mel Stottlemyre was a 20 game loser as he became a Yankee pitching coach. Hall of Famer Robin Roberts also lost 20, but he still won nearly 300 for his career.
And if misery loves company, let us not forget that 2 of the 5 greatest pitchers in baseball history (Walter Johnson and Cy Young) have 20 stapled to their otherwise incredible records. Then again, this was a time where losing 20 seemed to be all but expected.
So perhaps if the Pittsburgh fire sale comes around this year, maybe bright lights will beam down and escort Ohlendorf to a team that can get him at least 5 runs a game. Who knows? He could be a 10-game winner!
To think that a pitcher who is 1-11 can get a nearly $2million raise from roughly league minimum ($435,000) to just over $2million is quite a dream and it would definitely make Horatio Alger proud. However, in a celebration of getting one over on Pittsburgh with a little help from the arbitration team, we take a look at some other great losers who got to hang out a little longer due to the tangible things that aren't told by a win loss record.
Hall of Famer Steve Carlton in 1973 went 13-20 for the Phillies. Phil Neikro fared a little better in 1979 as he won 21 for Atlanta while losing 20.
Mike Maroth may have lost 20 for the 2003 Tigers, but his 9 wins were more than 20% of his teams 43 TOTAL wins. This does a lot to stop the bleeding (or at least provide a healthy dose of morphine) for a team that pretty much stank up the whole place until they convinced Ivan Rodriguez that a lot of money can rebuild a team, which is true because it took the Tigers from last in 03 to the World Series losers in 06.
Prior to that, in 1980, Brian Kingman was 8-20 for an Oakland team that wasn't that bad (they had a winning record), but they just couldn't win for Kingman who posted a sub 4 ERA in spite of the lack of love he was shown from his teammates.
Denny McClain was the last 30 game winner (31) in 1968 and led the league in wins the following year, but by 1971, he was washed up when he got his 20 losses.
Louis Tiant was a 20 game loser in 1969, but he became a dominant force for Boston a few years later. Everyone forgot that Mel Stottlemyre was a 20 game loser as he became a Yankee pitching coach. Hall of Famer Robin Roberts also lost 20, but he still won nearly 300 for his career.
And if misery loves company, let us not forget that 2 of the 5 greatest pitchers in baseball history (Walter Johnson and Cy Young) have 20 stapled to their otherwise incredible records. Then again, this was a time where losing 20 seemed to be all but expected.
So perhaps if the Pittsburgh fire sale comes around this year, maybe bright lights will beam down and escort Ohlendorf to a team that can get him at least 5 runs a game. Who knows? He could be a 10-game winner!
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Michael Young
Another day... no money or contract from St. Louis showing love to Albert Pujols. We remain completely confused, but there are so many things we are completely confused about.
The week rolls on and Michael Young lays the smack down on the team that he kept afloat for years after the owners did the team completely wrong with that inflated A-Rod contract that could only go one way (to the Big Apple after the financial hardships imploded the team once and for all), but then someone had to rebuild the team completely to get to the World Series via their first playoff victory EVER after years of trying and years of Yankees slam dunks. That was Michael Young who rose to solid status and showed he was a leader, but then there was Adrian Beltre, an opportunist who is known to do well in contract years, and he was getting 6 years for the potential that he might do OK, and perhaps he will, but where is the love as the Black Eyed Peas sang on Sunday night?
Where is it?
This is a man who now feels "misled and manipulated" by his team - not once, but multiple times.
Where is the love in that?
Sure, there's 3 years at $16million per for a 34 year old journeyman who moved positions every time that he was asked to. He mastered his position and played hard to bring glory to the Lone Star state. But when it all comes down to it, 2nd best makes a team assess what it can do to get it all. If you ask us, they screwed the pooch by choosing Beltre. Tons of money for a sometimes really good, sometimes OK player and the money that will have to be absorbed when Young gets shuttled elsewhere.
And perhaps the team will be back. They've got some youthful pitchers and they're in a weak division, but can they take the Sox or the Rays? Methinks, no, but alas, that's just me being careful with the money I wouldn't bet on the Rangers' options this October.
In the end, there are a lot of options for waiving that no trade contract, but the reporters seem to be talking about moving from the AL West to the NL West and helping the rebuilding youth movement in Denver that is the Rockies. That would be nice, but until then...
The divorce continues with lots of bad blood to follow.
Is this a sign for St. Louis and Albert? One week and counting.
The week rolls on and Michael Young lays the smack down on the team that he kept afloat for years after the owners did the team completely wrong with that inflated A-Rod contract that could only go one way (to the Big Apple after the financial hardships imploded the team once and for all), but then someone had to rebuild the team completely to get to the World Series via their first playoff victory EVER after years of trying and years of Yankees slam dunks. That was Michael Young who rose to solid status and showed he was a leader, but then there was Adrian Beltre, an opportunist who is known to do well in contract years, and he was getting 6 years for the potential that he might do OK, and perhaps he will, but where is the love as the Black Eyed Peas sang on Sunday night?
Where is it?
This is a man who now feels "misled and manipulated" by his team - not once, but multiple times.
Where is the love in that?
Sure, there's 3 years at $16million per for a 34 year old journeyman who moved positions every time that he was asked to. He mastered his position and played hard to bring glory to the Lone Star state. But when it all comes down to it, 2nd best makes a team assess what it can do to get it all. If you ask us, they screwed the pooch by choosing Beltre. Tons of money for a sometimes really good, sometimes OK player and the money that will have to be absorbed when Young gets shuttled elsewhere.
And perhaps the team will be back. They've got some youthful pitchers and they're in a weak division, but can they take the Sox or the Rays? Methinks, no, but alas, that's just me being careful with the money I wouldn't bet on the Rangers' options this October.
In the end, there are a lot of options for waiving that no trade contract, but the reporters seem to be talking about moving from the AL West to the NL West and helping the rebuilding youth movement in Denver that is the Rockies. That would be nice, but until then...
The divorce continues with lots of bad blood to follow.
Is this a sign for St. Louis and Albert? One week and counting.
Monday, February 7, 2011
Calvin Schiraldi
It's hard to like a sport that relies on the clock to end a game. The NBA has 4 quarters. The NHL has 3 periods. The NFL has 4 quarters. Of the big sports, only baseball and NASCAR have a system where something has to happen before the game ends. In 2 weeks, we'll see the Daytona 500, and we'll go 200 laps from start to stop. We'll even have multiple chances to get it right and go over the finish line if something nasty happens on the final lap and the caution flag waves. That's how it should be. Get it right. Things have to happen, or the game goes on.
The race to the finish at the end of the Superbowl sucks for one reason... it's sudden death against a clock NOT a powerful defensive line that stops a team cold and dead.
Mind you, I've always hated the clock. I'm not here to defend Ben Roethlisberger from a loss that he deserved (though I deserved the $25 that was on the line for a Steelers win). I'm just saying that if he wasn't trying to preserve time outs and had a chance to set up, it might have been a different game.
Baseball gets it right. Each team has 9 innings of 3 outs an inning to record 27 outs in combination of ground outs, fly outs, strike outs, or tagging out a runner trying to move ahead to the next base. It's not over until the singing starts. That's life on the diamond of baseball.
If you don't believe it, perhaps there is nowhere more readily exemplifiable as Game 6 of the 1986 World Series. Boston is up 5-3 on a home run by Dave Henderson and a Marty Barrett single that scores Wade Boggs. It's now the bottom of the 10th and we have just witnessed 2 fly balls to the outfield. Two down. Gary Carter is up with the Mets down by 2, and he comes through with a 2-1 count single. Kevin Mitchell steps up and he singles on an 0-1 count. Carter is on second and it's 3 pitches from the end. The Mets are still down by 2, and now we see Ray Knight go to 0-2 and he singles! Carter to third, but we've still got a 1 run lead for the Red Sox who have the wheels falling off, so out comes Bob Stanley to get 1 runner. A wild pitch later on a 3-2 count to Mookie Wilson, and we have Carter over the plate and Knight on second base.
To protect the already defamed, we all know what happens next. A poor unfortunate once great first baseman with leg problems who wasn't relieved for a better defensive second baseeman lets the ball go through his legs, the Red Sox lose, and then they blow Game 7, too.
Once again, they had the chance to win it all. They even had the lead in Game 7. But for those people that can't close the deal, why should there be a win? Mariano Rivera saved a ton of games when it counted, but in Game 7 of 2001, he couldn't seal the deal. He never took a knee. He lost like a man in the same way he won like a man when it counted all of those other times.
Unfortunately, the big game of the year is a one and done football game, which is just how their sport works. There's too much to lose if we force players to play more games than they do. The crush and contact makes it necessary because as we all know players are property, or at the very least, they're investments meant to be coddled like an adorable little Muppet baby of a child that must be protected from the world or a former ALCS hero third baseman that gets injured in a basketball pickup game that he wasn't allowed (by contract) to play in...
Unless they're a big time thug NFL quarterback with no helmet and no permit crashing out his motorcycle because that's the cool thing to do, which brings us back to jump where we look at how football players differ from baseball players: the sense of entitlement that thinks being the guy with the ball and the guy with the rings makes all the difference.
Sure, it takes a man to wear a boot when he's injured and risk further injury while leading his team to victory (though it's better if your sock shows blood and you beat your hated opponents - props to you, Curt Schilling). However, that doesn't change that the game and the culture of the NFL is flawed.
This is just one man's opinion... that's all.
The race to the finish at the end of the Superbowl sucks for one reason... it's sudden death against a clock NOT a powerful defensive line that stops a team cold and dead.
Mind you, I've always hated the clock. I'm not here to defend Ben Roethlisberger from a loss that he deserved (though I deserved the $25 that was on the line for a Steelers win). I'm just saying that if he wasn't trying to preserve time outs and had a chance to set up, it might have been a different game.
Baseball gets it right. Each team has 9 innings of 3 outs an inning to record 27 outs in combination of ground outs, fly outs, strike outs, or tagging out a runner trying to move ahead to the next base. It's not over until the singing starts. That's life on the diamond of baseball.
If you don't believe it, perhaps there is nowhere more readily exemplifiable as Game 6 of the 1986 World Series. Boston is up 5-3 on a home run by Dave Henderson and a Marty Barrett single that scores Wade Boggs. It's now the bottom of the 10th and we have just witnessed 2 fly balls to the outfield. Two down. Gary Carter is up with the Mets down by 2, and he comes through with a 2-1 count single. Kevin Mitchell steps up and he singles on an 0-1 count. Carter is on second and it's 3 pitches from the end. The Mets are still down by 2, and now we see Ray Knight go to 0-2 and he singles! Carter to third, but we've still got a 1 run lead for the Red Sox who have the wheels falling off, so out comes Bob Stanley to get 1 runner. A wild pitch later on a 3-2 count to Mookie Wilson, and we have Carter over the plate and Knight on second base.
To protect the already defamed, we all know what happens next. A poor unfortunate once great first baseman with leg problems who wasn't relieved for a better defensive second baseeman lets the ball go through his legs, the Red Sox lose, and then they blow Game 7, too.
Once again, they had the chance to win it all. They even had the lead in Game 7. But for those people that can't close the deal, why should there be a win? Mariano Rivera saved a ton of games when it counted, but in Game 7 of 2001, he couldn't seal the deal. He never took a knee. He lost like a man in the same way he won like a man when it counted all of those other times.
Unfortunately, the big game of the year is a one and done football game, which is just how their sport works. There's too much to lose if we force players to play more games than they do. The crush and contact makes it necessary because as we all know players are property, or at the very least, they're investments meant to be coddled like an adorable little Muppet baby of a child that must be protected from the world or a former ALCS hero third baseman that gets injured in a basketball pickup game that he wasn't allowed (by contract) to play in...
Unless they're a big time thug NFL quarterback with no helmet and no permit crashing out his motorcycle because that's the cool thing to do, which brings us back to jump where we look at how football players differ from baseball players: the sense of entitlement that thinks being the guy with the ball and the guy with the rings makes all the difference.
Sure, it takes a man to wear a boot when he's injured and risk further injury while leading his team to victory (though it's better if your sock shows blood and you beat your hated opponents - props to you, Curt Schilling). However, that doesn't change that the game and the culture of the NFL is flawed.
This is just one man's opinion... that's all.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Jim Thorpe
There's something about the spectacle that is the Superbowl. The pomp, the circumstance, the hype, and the hope that 2 teams can come together in an epic clash and make it all the way to the end of the 4th quarter and still be going strong enough that they both have a chance to win because that's what it's all about.
Somewhere in the game is a minor league carnival of whatever. While there aren't T-shirt cannons and crazy ostrich riders / hot dog vendors, there is still enough "other stuff" that people who don't care about football can enjoy the jubilation of Rah Rah America Kicks Ass Day (if Obama really wants to impress me, he'll rename Superbowl Sunday as such and make the next day an official half day like they did when I was in the Air Force (at least in the early 1990s at the European clinic I worked at with regards to all un-necessary personell since the game was televised VERY late at night on AFN)).
But the Superbowl is the epitome of America. Baseball really can't compete with the "general public" though George Carlin was right about it. Baseball's spectacles just aren't the same since the death of Bill Veeck. The World Series is 7 games and it's not do or die. The All-Star Game (in baseball as in all sports) is a series of spectacles and some applause for who was announced with no Pete Rose / Ray Fosse moment since it's all about being owned by the team and to play one's heart out in a game that doesn't count towards the standings... anathema! Well, at least it is for modern players.
Back in the day, athletes could be great and play 2 sports. Danny Ainge was a Blue Jay, but he chose the Celtics instead, which was a good choice because the Celtics were dominant in the Larry Bird era. Bo Jackson bled his heart out on two fields and made Buck O' Neil salivate over the sound of his bat (unfortunately, I never heard this because I was young and in England and totally un-concerned with the sports whose trading cards I grew up with).
Jim Thorpe who became the new namesake for the town of Mauch Chunk (the best place to spend a weekend in eastern PA HANDS DOWN as it offers fine dining, cultural entertainment, river adventure, waterfalls, ghosts, and antiques all in one cozy 19th century Swiss styled town) was also a 2-sport athlete after getting hosed out of his gold medals in the 1912 Olympics because he played baseball. Nevertheless, this half Native American went on to be gushed over by the Associated Press as the greatest male athlete of the first part of the 20th century (1950) in much the same way King Gustav drooled over him way back when he was still getting ready to dominate in the Olympics. ABC did them all one better by declaring him the greatest athlete of the 20th century.
Johnny Come Latelies aside, the rectifying of his gold medals in 1982 restored the memory of this great athlete to where it should have always been.
However, more people remember 2-sport athletes like Deion Sanders and his flashy personality than do Jim Thorpe, which is a shame as it shows our tunnel vision for the now instead of the past. It's kind of like looking at the Black Eyed Peas halftime show as an example of great music. Sure, Will I Am and Usher's "OMG" is a great pop song. So is "Tonight's Gonna Be a Good Night." However, their live show... nicht so gut. Seeing Slash playing with Fergie, who is perhaps the WORST performer in the history of performances (she's not attractive, she can't sing, she can't dance - it's the trifecta of uselessness) was a sad state of mainstream music in 2011. I know that the last couple of performances were largely white rock since the Wardrobe Malfunction, but c'mon...
It's bad enough that the Superbowl didn't even try to get glitzy until they used George Burns and Mickey Rooney in 1987. In 1991, they switched it up with New Kids on the Block, and in 1993, the self-proclaimed King of Pop, who we just look at as a permanent scumbag, but alas, I digress... and half time shows were now even more important than the game (just not the commericals that now cost around $3million for 30 seconds). But one again, c'mon. Can we not do better than Fergie? Can Will I Am not kick her to curb once and for all?
One can only hope (not that baseball's choice of musicians to raise the roof is that great since they used Counting Crows who despite having one of the greatest CDs ever (August and Everything After) were 12 years removed from being good, and even then, they weren't in their element, which is whiney introspective pop.
But yes... here's to the joy of the Superbowl- even if it's a spectacle where we get sucked into rooting for Thug Ben because we draw a $25 chance to win if the Steelers win (and we end up hating him EVEN more).
And here's to minor league baseball - because it's still baseball - the greatest sport in the world.
Somewhere in the game is a minor league carnival of whatever. While there aren't T-shirt cannons and crazy ostrich riders / hot dog vendors, there is still enough "other stuff" that people who don't care about football can enjoy the jubilation of Rah Rah America Kicks Ass Day (if Obama really wants to impress me, he'll rename Superbowl Sunday as such and make the next day an official half day like they did when I was in the Air Force (at least in the early 1990s at the European clinic I worked at with regards to all un-necessary personell since the game was televised VERY late at night on AFN)).
But the Superbowl is the epitome of America. Baseball really can't compete with the "general public" though George Carlin was right about it. Baseball's spectacles just aren't the same since the death of Bill Veeck. The World Series is 7 games and it's not do or die. The All-Star Game (in baseball as in all sports) is a series of spectacles and some applause for who was announced with no Pete Rose / Ray Fosse moment since it's all about being owned by the team and to play one's heart out in a game that doesn't count towards the standings... anathema! Well, at least it is for modern players.
Back in the day, athletes could be great and play 2 sports. Danny Ainge was a Blue Jay, but he chose the Celtics instead, which was a good choice because the Celtics were dominant in the Larry Bird era. Bo Jackson bled his heart out on two fields and made Buck O' Neil salivate over the sound of his bat (unfortunately, I never heard this because I was young and in England and totally un-concerned with the sports whose trading cards I grew up with).
Jim Thorpe who became the new namesake for the town of Mauch Chunk (the best place to spend a weekend in eastern PA HANDS DOWN as it offers fine dining, cultural entertainment, river adventure, waterfalls, ghosts, and antiques all in one cozy 19th century Swiss styled town) was also a 2-sport athlete after getting hosed out of his gold medals in the 1912 Olympics because he played baseball. Nevertheless, this half Native American went on to be gushed over by the Associated Press as the greatest male athlete of the first part of the 20th century (1950) in much the same way King Gustav drooled over him way back when he was still getting ready to dominate in the Olympics. ABC did them all one better by declaring him the greatest athlete of the 20th century.
Johnny Come Latelies aside, the rectifying of his gold medals in 1982 restored the memory of this great athlete to where it should have always been.
However, more people remember 2-sport athletes like Deion Sanders and his flashy personality than do Jim Thorpe, which is a shame as it shows our tunnel vision for the now instead of the past. It's kind of like looking at the Black Eyed Peas halftime show as an example of great music. Sure, Will I Am and Usher's "OMG" is a great pop song. So is "Tonight's Gonna Be a Good Night." However, their live show... nicht so gut. Seeing Slash playing with Fergie, who is perhaps the WORST performer in the history of performances (she's not attractive, she can't sing, she can't dance - it's the trifecta of uselessness) was a sad state of mainstream music in 2011. I know that the last couple of performances were largely white rock since the Wardrobe Malfunction, but c'mon...
It's bad enough that the Superbowl didn't even try to get glitzy until they used George Burns and Mickey Rooney in 1987. In 1991, they switched it up with New Kids on the Block, and in 1993, the self-proclaimed King of Pop, who we just look at as a permanent scumbag, but alas, I digress... and half time shows were now even more important than the game (just not the commericals that now cost around $3million for 30 seconds). But one again, c'mon. Can we not do better than Fergie? Can Will I Am not kick her to curb once and for all?
One can only hope (not that baseball's choice of musicians to raise the roof is that great since they used Counting Crows who despite having one of the greatest CDs ever (August and Everything After) were 12 years removed from being good, and even then, they weren't in their element, which is whiney introspective pop.
But yes... here's to the joy of the Superbowl- even if it's a spectacle where we get sucked into rooting for Thug Ben because we draw a $25 chance to win if the Steelers win (and we end up hating him EVEN more).
And here's to minor league baseball - because it's still baseball - the greatest sport in the world.
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Francisco Liriano
The future is always brighter when multi millions come your way. On that note, Vladamir Guerrero must be smiling like the Cheshire Cat at his bluff of another offer to the Baltimore Orioles didn't get called and he got them to pony up $8million (baseball money, it's not in any way real). We'll see if all this money thrown around to whiff kings, sluggers, and could be pitchers makes Baltimore 2011 look like Baltimore 1983 or Tampa Bay 1999.
I'm going to say that I know where my money is.
All the same, for as unreal as baseball money is, it's great to see players get rewarded for success.
Even more than that, it's great to see players bounce back from Tommy John surgery and get some cash for their pains. I can't wait to see Stephen Strasburg come back and kick ass with an indestructible arm and youthful enthusiasm as he makes the Nationals the dominant team in the N.L. East. More than anything, I just want to see Ryan Howard sitting at home all October and dreaming about the wasted opportunities he had while he was whiffing away in the big games, but alas, I digress.
Last year, Francisco Liriano went 14-10 for a rather pitiful Twins team (pitiful in that A) they incite pity and B) they aren't destined to EVER succeed in the post Kirby Puckett team except in winning a division that is essentially whoever makes the biggest move out of the Twins, Tigers, and White Sox). His first half was better than his second half, and he returned to 2006 form after not healing quickly enough and pretty much sucking 2009 up. Sure, we can blame that on Minnesota as well. After the end of July, he came back for a game in August and a game in September. He didn't do well in either of them, and they cost him 3 years if you include surgery.
Now, he's back with a new contract, and we have to feel good about that gesture. Hopefully, he can return to the form that saw him 12-2.
It's never a good thing to waste a young pitcher, and let's be honest, Joe Mauer, Justin Morneau, and Michael Cuddyer aren't getting any younger. Neither is Jim Thome who has 600 home runs and a return to the fall classic on his mind. However, the Twins aren't necessarily built to compete into mid October. Pavano, Baker, Slowey, and the rest don't inspire fear in hitters, no matter how kind the resigning of Pavano was. Liriano is the answer and the question mark, and we can only hope the $4.3 million gesture from the Twin Cities will energize him to play hard and to see if they can take out the AL West champion or the AL Wild Card team and bring the Twins back to glory.
Heaven knows that Joe "I really can't stop ANYTHING that the Yankees throw at me" Nathan isn't the answer at the end or middle of ball games.
I'm going to say that I know where my money is.
All the same, for as unreal as baseball money is, it's great to see players get rewarded for success.
Even more than that, it's great to see players bounce back from Tommy John surgery and get some cash for their pains. I can't wait to see Stephen Strasburg come back and kick ass with an indestructible arm and youthful enthusiasm as he makes the Nationals the dominant team in the N.L. East. More than anything, I just want to see Ryan Howard sitting at home all October and dreaming about the wasted opportunities he had while he was whiffing away in the big games, but alas, I digress.
Last year, Francisco Liriano went 14-10 for a rather pitiful Twins team (pitiful in that A) they incite pity and B) they aren't destined to EVER succeed in the post Kirby Puckett team except in winning a division that is essentially whoever makes the biggest move out of the Twins, Tigers, and White Sox). His first half was better than his second half, and he returned to 2006 form after not healing quickly enough and pretty much sucking 2009 up. Sure, we can blame that on Minnesota as well. After the end of July, he came back for a game in August and a game in September. He didn't do well in either of them, and they cost him 3 years if you include surgery.
Now, he's back with a new contract, and we have to feel good about that gesture. Hopefully, he can return to the form that saw him 12-2.
It's never a good thing to waste a young pitcher, and let's be honest, Joe Mauer, Justin Morneau, and Michael Cuddyer aren't getting any younger. Neither is Jim Thome who has 600 home runs and a return to the fall classic on his mind. However, the Twins aren't necessarily built to compete into mid October. Pavano, Baker, Slowey, and the rest don't inspire fear in hitters, no matter how kind the resigning of Pavano was. Liriano is the answer and the question mark, and we can only hope the $4.3 million gesture from the Twin Cities will energize him to play hard and to see if they can take out the AL West champion or the AL Wild Card team and bring the Twins back to glory.
Heaven knows that Joe "I really can't stop ANYTHING that the Yankees throw at me" Nathan isn't the answer at the end or middle of ball games.
Friday, February 4, 2011
Matt Kemp
Since meeting my wife, I listen to a lot more radio pop, R+B, and rap. Out of all hip hop, I would have to say that pretty much everything that JayZ does is pretty good. Sure, he has some pretty bad stuff out there, but the Black Album and the original Blueprint are great. I really like "Empire State of Mind" as well, but as a whole, the CD is not very good. Nowhere is this more true than in the chorus of "Run This Town," which features Rihanna totally decimating an otherwise good song.
Not to justify Chris Brown hitting her, but I've always felt that a career that had exactly one good song ("Umbrella") has been drug out to infinity as the music world feels that it has to feature her everywhere that it possibly can because abusive relationships are big business in music and the world of reality TV. But like "Umbrella," which was good for the first 200 or so times, it got old. The same can be said for her duet with Eminem ("Love the Way You Lie"). If the radio stations play it enough (once every hour or two), it becomes infectious, and when it hits that level, it works, but to hear her and Drake singing... it's like listening to some idiotic eighth grader going off with asinine sexual innuendo and jokes. Completely unendurable.
One wonders if Rihanna would be anywhere without Jay Z. Seeing images of her alongside Taylor Swift on TRL back in the day, they were both overly made up and "sexified" in their younger days in the hopes that videos could propel them to stardom, and they truly did.
Rihanna became a darling of the rap and rock world crossing barriers because of ultra wise promotion and Taylor Swift simultaneously became a country and pop darling. Neither could do any wrong for the longest time - Kanye West be damned. However, Rihanna got smacked up before the MTV awards and Taylor Swift dated Bubble Boy, and yeah... it's a brave new world for each of them.
Hopefully, the future holds good men for each of them. Just because Rihanna sings terrible songs like "Rude Boy" (actually tolerable when mixed with Fugazi's "Waiting Room" on Girl Talk's All Day) and "Take a Bow" while resurrecting the self-promoted King of Pop for "Don't Stop the Music" to cash in on the nostalgia trip that was Michael Jackson, a move that paid off as he got relevant in overdosing to those of us not smart enough to know better.
For a while, Rihanna was the "Only Girl in the World" for Matt Kemp, and that was nice because baseball players in 2011 have a reputation to live up to and we all know that none of them are ever wife beaters - maybe father in law beaters like Francisco Rodriguez, but yeah...
However, his career suffered as hers sky rocketed. Sure, he got 28 home runs last year, but he had his lowest batting average and his whiffs increased to 170. From a guy that was supposed to be first round fantasy, he was now average. Fortunately, even if he didn't get the rihannas (a severe gastro-intestinal disorder, or so it sounds), she got tired of him and pushed forward to her extended 15 minutes of fame and went to her schedule instead of her ballplayer.
And both will romantically do better than each other. That's just the nature of their business. The question is whether Matt Kemp can rebound in 2011. Perhaps, he'll need some antibiotics to get rid of the rihannas. Hopefully, we can just push fluids. Either way, he'll need to show some reliability before anyone touts him that highly again.
Not to justify Chris Brown hitting her, but I've always felt that a career that had exactly one good song ("Umbrella") has been drug out to infinity as the music world feels that it has to feature her everywhere that it possibly can because abusive relationships are big business in music and the world of reality TV. But like "Umbrella," which was good for the first 200 or so times, it got old. The same can be said for her duet with Eminem ("Love the Way You Lie"). If the radio stations play it enough (once every hour or two), it becomes infectious, and when it hits that level, it works, but to hear her and Drake singing... it's like listening to some idiotic eighth grader going off with asinine sexual innuendo and jokes. Completely unendurable.
One wonders if Rihanna would be anywhere without Jay Z. Seeing images of her alongside Taylor Swift on TRL back in the day, they were both overly made up and "sexified" in their younger days in the hopes that videos could propel them to stardom, and they truly did.
Rihanna became a darling of the rap and rock world crossing barriers because of ultra wise promotion and Taylor Swift simultaneously became a country and pop darling. Neither could do any wrong for the longest time - Kanye West be damned. However, Rihanna got smacked up before the MTV awards and Taylor Swift dated Bubble Boy, and yeah... it's a brave new world for each of them.
Hopefully, the future holds good men for each of them. Just because Rihanna sings terrible songs like "Rude Boy" (actually tolerable when mixed with Fugazi's "Waiting Room" on Girl Talk's All Day) and "Take a Bow" while resurrecting the self-promoted King of Pop for "Don't Stop the Music" to cash in on the nostalgia trip that was Michael Jackson, a move that paid off as he got relevant in overdosing to those of us not smart enough to know better.
For a while, Rihanna was the "Only Girl in the World" for Matt Kemp, and that was nice because baseball players in 2011 have a reputation to live up to and we all know that none of them are ever wife beaters - maybe father in law beaters like Francisco Rodriguez, but yeah...
However, his career suffered as hers sky rocketed. Sure, he got 28 home runs last year, but he had his lowest batting average and his whiffs increased to 170. From a guy that was supposed to be first round fantasy, he was now average. Fortunately, even if he didn't get the rihannas (a severe gastro-intestinal disorder, or so it sounds), she got tired of him and pushed forward to her extended 15 minutes of fame and went to her schedule instead of her ballplayer.
And both will romantically do better than each other. That's just the nature of their business. The question is whether Matt Kemp can rebound in 2011. Perhaps, he'll need some antibiotics to get rid of the rihannas. Hopefully, we can just push fluids. Either way, he'll need to show some reliability before anyone touts him that highly again.
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Rickie "Wild Thing" Vaughn
Every night, my wife and I watch what she refers to as way too much TV. I'm home first, so if I'm downstairs, the first thing on is usually Seinfeld, which is still a classic show despite the fact that the earlier seasons featured some really AWFUL fashion. Not that I'm a fashion guy - I could care less. Give me a T-shirt and a pair of loose fitting pants, and life is good, but I get all of these memories of the early nineties watching that show, and I just think back to how bad the late eighties through the early nineties (until grunge hit big) really were - even if Jason Alexander and Jerry Seinfeld were one of the greatest duos in comedy ever. Personally, I found some of Michael Richards to be amusing, and Julia Louis-Dreyfus was a good fit, it's not like they ran the show the way that Jerry and Jason did. Call it the show of the time, and the TV stations do since it lives on in syndication forever and ever and ever.
This is a period that I often refer to as the dead era of American pop culture. For my last years of high school and the time afterward when I was in the Air Force in Europe, I missed a lot of popular shows like Quantum Leap and the Wonder Years. I've seen the latter, but never the former, and for some reason, the stations don't syndicate Fred Savage the way that they do other shows that have been on for WAY too long.
Somehow, that period of time still seems to leave a lot of things in our lives in 2011. Most of them aren't as good as the original Die Hard, which was truly a classic movie of our lives, or even the grand daddy baseball movie of them all (Bull Durham) and its twin (Field of Dreams), but at least we're not constantly bombarded with Steel Magnolias, Sister Act or Ghost. Sure, we get Roadhouse, but that's different since who doesn't want to watch Patrick Swayze kicking ass (dancing, not so much, but beating the crap out of thugs - oh, hell yeah).
From the completely opposite end of the spectrum, The Cosby Show is even better in reruns than it was when it first came out. That's the thing about great reruns... you can watch them over and over and over from the start and just flow with it. I've gone through periods of time in the last 15 years where I saw every episode of The Simpsons, Home Improvement, Everybody Loves Raymond, and Scrubs. Reruns seem to work better as comedic half hour shows. Most of these shows weren't hits FOR ME right away in prime time, or at least I wasn't watching them in prime time slots. That's the joy of reruns... you can get addicted to something and watch it over and over again every night of the week. Good shows survive and we get to see them and enjoy them for all times sake.
In the eighties, there was Different Strokes, Facts of Life, Silver Spoons, and classic fare like Gilligan's Island, What's Happening, Leave it to Beaver, and The Brady Bunch. They all served a purpose in making the time go by and connecting us to different times throughout history. Besides, who can forget Rerun asking, "Which Doobie do you be?" However, now it's a world different. Now, we're stuck with hours and hours a day of Two and a Half Men because television has been reduced to a world of crappy reality TV that doesn't play well in syndication. Things aren't going to get better, so we just get more crap like TMZ or multiple episodes of bad comedies (to include the last 12 years of the Simpsons, which can be funny, but mostly is just a special guest or a "Treehouse of Horror" episode). Thus, I get Two and a Half Men, and every time it comes on, I can't help but think the same thing...
I HATE CHARLIE SHEEN.
He's just a piece of crap. Let's be honest. Somewhere in all of the repeated life problems and porn star obsession, he makes the same mistake over and over, and with it, he just inspires serious amounts of loathing and hatred. It's gotten to the point where I can't even watch Major League because he's in it, and that's a shame because some of the other actors make the movie as enjoyable as it is.
For example, Dennis Haysbert is a great actor. Whether it's as Pedro Cerrano or as President Palmer or even the All State guy, he's just charismatic and entertaining. Even middle aged dead wood like Corbin Bernson work well. Tom Berenger plays a good lead role, which works well as he always plays solid in stuff like Betrayed and Born on the Fourth of July. I've never been a Rene Russo fan, but she's ok. Wesley Snipes may be a tax cheat, but he's not keeping me from watching that movie. Hell, if he gets annoying, I can imagine Ice-T saying that he wants to kick the tar out of him so badly that his "dick is getting hard." If you haven't seen that, you really need to re-watch that other classic early nineties movie New Jack City.
And throughout it all, there's Bob Uecker... how can you go wrong with Bob Uecker?
But all the same, there's Charlie Sheen, and I hate Charlie Sheen. I really do. I wish he would just vanish and take his stupid show with Duckie and vanish into the Bermuda Triangle, I really do.
And I haven't even started to get into how much they ruined the little kid from the Rookie, which may be the ultimate crime in all of that show's many transgressions against humanity.
Charlie Sheen... I hate you. Phillies fans should hate you. Your nickname became the name of Mitch Williams who imploded in 1993. Defense attorneys hate you.
Only prostitutes, high class drug dealers, and porn stars like you.
That's not good company.
Just take your sorry ass and leave.
Yeah... Charlie... I'm hating on you.
This is a period that I often refer to as the dead era of American pop culture. For my last years of high school and the time afterward when I was in the Air Force in Europe, I missed a lot of popular shows like Quantum Leap and the Wonder Years. I've seen the latter, but never the former, and for some reason, the stations don't syndicate Fred Savage the way that they do other shows that have been on for WAY too long.
Somehow, that period of time still seems to leave a lot of things in our lives in 2011. Most of them aren't as good as the original Die Hard, which was truly a classic movie of our lives, or even the grand daddy baseball movie of them all (Bull Durham) and its twin (Field of Dreams), but at least we're not constantly bombarded with Steel Magnolias, Sister Act or Ghost. Sure, we get Roadhouse, but that's different since who doesn't want to watch Patrick Swayze kicking ass (dancing, not so much, but beating the crap out of thugs - oh, hell yeah).
From the completely opposite end of the spectrum, The Cosby Show is even better in reruns than it was when it first came out. That's the thing about great reruns... you can watch them over and over and over from the start and just flow with it. I've gone through periods of time in the last 15 years where I saw every episode of The Simpsons, Home Improvement, Everybody Loves Raymond, and Scrubs. Reruns seem to work better as comedic half hour shows. Most of these shows weren't hits FOR ME right away in prime time, or at least I wasn't watching them in prime time slots. That's the joy of reruns... you can get addicted to something and watch it over and over again every night of the week. Good shows survive and we get to see them and enjoy them for all times sake.
In the eighties, there was Different Strokes, Facts of Life, Silver Spoons, and classic fare like Gilligan's Island, What's Happening, Leave it to Beaver, and The Brady Bunch. They all served a purpose in making the time go by and connecting us to different times throughout history. Besides, who can forget Rerun asking, "Which Doobie do you be?" However, now it's a world different. Now, we're stuck with hours and hours a day of Two and a Half Men because television has been reduced to a world of crappy reality TV that doesn't play well in syndication. Things aren't going to get better, so we just get more crap like TMZ or multiple episodes of bad comedies (to include the last 12 years of the Simpsons, which can be funny, but mostly is just a special guest or a "Treehouse of Horror" episode). Thus, I get Two and a Half Men, and every time it comes on, I can't help but think the same thing...
I HATE CHARLIE SHEEN.
He's just a piece of crap. Let's be honest. Somewhere in all of the repeated life problems and porn star obsession, he makes the same mistake over and over, and with it, he just inspires serious amounts of loathing and hatred. It's gotten to the point where I can't even watch Major League because he's in it, and that's a shame because some of the other actors make the movie as enjoyable as it is.
For example, Dennis Haysbert is a great actor. Whether it's as Pedro Cerrano or as President Palmer or even the All State guy, he's just charismatic and entertaining. Even middle aged dead wood like Corbin Bernson work well. Tom Berenger plays a good lead role, which works well as he always plays solid in stuff like Betrayed and Born on the Fourth of July. I've never been a Rene Russo fan, but she's ok. Wesley Snipes may be a tax cheat, but he's not keeping me from watching that movie. Hell, if he gets annoying, I can imagine Ice-T saying that he wants to kick the tar out of him so badly that his "dick is getting hard." If you haven't seen that, you really need to re-watch that other classic early nineties movie New Jack City.
And throughout it all, there's Bob Uecker... how can you go wrong with Bob Uecker?
But all the same, there's Charlie Sheen, and I hate Charlie Sheen. I really do. I wish he would just vanish and take his stupid show with Duckie and vanish into the Bermuda Triangle, I really do.
And I haven't even started to get into how much they ruined the little kid from the Rookie, which may be the ultimate crime in all of that show's many transgressions against humanity.
Charlie Sheen... I hate you. Phillies fans should hate you. Your nickname became the name of Mitch Williams who imploded in 1993. Defense attorneys hate you.
Only prostitutes, high class drug dealers, and porn stars like you.
That's not good company.
Just take your sorry ass and leave.
Yeah... Charlie... I'm hating on you.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Michael Bourne
I guess it's a good day since we've been given reprieve and told by a rodent that we're getting spring in 6 weeks (as opposed to 6 more weeks of winter), so we will continue to burn the hot stove for the day that will be Pitchers and Catchers Report Day.
In doing this, we read and think baseball. Other than ESPN, we generally will read Bleacher Report, which is actually a pretty decent baseball site that breaks things down as a mix between USA Today and Maxim. We get our baseball knowledge quick and simple, and if we are so inclined, we can see who the hottest wives and girlfriends of players are.
Today, they have a list of players who need long term extensions other than Albert Pujols, who I am still curious how the talks can go this long. I keep hoping the hot stove heats up all the way and I FINALLY get to wake up on one of these cold and icy days and hear something really good other than my alarm, which will inevitably send me to school, or as was the case today, the computer so that I could eventually figure out that school was canceled as the rain keeps freezing up on the highways and pavements, thus preventing school.
So let's see who gets picked. Michael Bourne? Get real. Sure, he steals bases, but he has no power and his batting average isn't that great. In fact, his bases stolen went down last year. A long term deal with him is like the Eagles signing Donovan McNabb until he was eligible for AARP when he first came out of the gate.
Anibal Sanchez is up next, and let's be honest, other than a great rookie year and a no hitter, he's above average, but does that equal a long term deal? If we're giving money and lifetime contracts away, I'll take one. Hell, I'd be happy for a few good years and a shoe deal (a pair of sneakers, water hiking shoes, and dress shoes - I won't even ask for them to be player endorsed).
Jonathan Papelbon is next. Obviously, these guys didn't read my discussion on closers. This guy needs to be retired to some Irish bar in South Boston - not signed to a long deal. Get real. The future is already in Boston (Daniel Bard). Why pay this guy well over $10million per in the hopes that he can close until he gets as old as Trevor Hoffman when he finally realized he wasn't really that special.
Grady Sizemore is an injury risk, but other than that, Cleveland has to show love for a hometown player soon before they all end up on the Red Sox and Yankees through trades and free agency.
Brandon Phillips has a lot of love for his second sack ability, but is that reason to sign him long term and give him 9 figures or upper eights?
Jose Bautista had a good year. He figured out how to hit home runs. Does that mean he gets a big salary? Not after one year it doesn't.
Matt Cain is a World Series hero and above average for the seasons that he plays. As a result, he can handle himself when it counts and since the Giants are primed to compete for years to come, this is the first choice that seems realistic.
Cole Hamels - I already said my peace about him, but other than being able to sue for non-support, it's not that he's bad. He's just not a player I want to build a team around. However, as the number 4 starter in a rotation that stands to be dominant for ages, he's a good cog in the machine, but that still doesn't get the Phillies a bat in their lineup, which is what they really need.
Prince Fielder has an ugly swing and a declining production trend. He was given over $15million for an additional season. If he gets it together when it counts, he might be worth a couple more years, but long term and big bucks? Weren't the Brewers expecting to lose him? Is Zach Greinke and a few young players really worth spending lots of money and building around? The Reds and Cards are here to stay and in a division that tough in a stadium that yields lots of home runs, is he really all that he's cracked up to be? I wouldn't pay big bucks for him with all those what ifs, and frankly, Bud Selig probably won't either, but that said, he is a decent personality for where baseball is in 2011.
They also list Josh Hamilton, and I get that for the same reason that Fielder is a decent personality for baseball 2011. I've written about that before, but frankly, just as Sizemore is an injury risk, Hamilton is a relapse risk. We've seen that before. If he shows us some discipline, we can show him some paycheck love, but frankly, he's scary to two groups: his opponents who he can just crush and his team who can lose him if he gets injured or sent to rehab. Personally, he's worth a short contract with some nice figures, but long term?
We live in a society that is currently $14 trillion in debt. This number goes up like a clock moves through the day. It just happens. Some of us want to pay it off and be fiscally responsible while others want to spend like there is no tomorrow. Some of us wonder if it can ever be paid off (I'm in that group). It almost makes me think we're trying to bankrupt China the way we did the Soviets, but alas, if we keep borrowing from the Chinese, eventually someone is going to come collecting or just declare that they own this country. It's a scary proposition and nowhere is it more true than with baseball money. The salaries are so large and ridiculous, that it's insane. I don't blame the players for taking it or even asking for it since the owners have paid for so long, but still... it's crazy.
Stores like the one out of Bleacher Report underscore the insanity that is our country's financial crisis, but that said, I like dingers when batters are hitting them into orbit, and I love strikeouts when pitchers are dropping curves from 12 to 6 to make batters look stupid.
I guess it's all a no win thing because my game won't pull in it's belt and tighten up and asses will still find their way to the seats.
As a result, we will bemoan the future of our game and wonder if Bleacher Report is on crack. We think they are, and to that, we can only offer them Whitney's advice: "Crack is whack."
In doing this, we read and think baseball. Other than ESPN, we generally will read Bleacher Report, which is actually a pretty decent baseball site that breaks things down as a mix between USA Today and Maxim. We get our baseball knowledge quick and simple, and if we are so inclined, we can see who the hottest wives and girlfriends of players are.
Today, they have a list of players who need long term extensions other than Albert Pujols, who I am still curious how the talks can go this long. I keep hoping the hot stove heats up all the way and I FINALLY get to wake up on one of these cold and icy days and hear something really good other than my alarm, which will inevitably send me to school, or as was the case today, the computer so that I could eventually figure out that school was canceled as the rain keeps freezing up on the highways and pavements, thus preventing school.
So let's see who gets picked. Michael Bourne? Get real. Sure, he steals bases, but he has no power and his batting average isn't that great. In fact, his bases stolen went down last year. A long term deal with him is like the Eagles signing Donovan McNabb until he was eligible for AARP when he first came out of the gate.
Anibal Sanchez is up next, and let's be honest, other than a great rookie year and a no hitter, he's above average, but does that equal a long term deal? If we're giving money and lifetime contracts away, I'll take one. Hell, I'd be happy for a few good years and a shoe deal (a pair of sneakers, water hiking shoes, and dress shoes - I won't even ask for them to be player endorsed).
Jonathan Papelbon is next. Obviously, these guys didn't read my discussion on closers. This guy needs to be retired to some Irish bar in South Boston - not signed to a long deal. Get real. The future is already in Boston (Daniel Bard). Why pay this guy well over $10million per in the hopes that he can close until he gets as old as Trevor Hoffman when he finally realized he wasn't really that special.
Grady Sizemore is an injury risk, but other than that, Cleveland has to show love for a hometown player soon before they all end up on the Red Sox and Yankees through trades and free agency.
Brandon Phillips has a lot of love for his second sack ability, but is that reason to sign him long term and give him 9 figures or upper eights?
Jose Bautista had a good year. He figured out how to hit home runs. Does that mean he gets a big salary? Not after one year it doesn't.
Matt Cain is a World Series hero and above average for the seasons that he plays. As a result, he can handle himself when it counts and since the Giants are primed to compete for years to come, this is the first choice that seems realistic.
Cole Hamels - I already said my peace about him, but other than being able to sue for non-support, it's not that he's bad. He's just not a player I want to build a team around. However, as the number 4 starter in a rotation that stands to be dominant for ages, he's a good cog in the machine, but that still doesn't get the Phillies a bat in their lineup, which is what they really need.
Prince Fielder has an ugly swing and a declining production trend. He was given over $15million for an additional season. If he gets it together when it counts, he might be worth a couple more years, but long term and big bucks? Weren't the Brewers expecting to lose him? Is Zach Greinke and a few young players really worth spending lots of money and building around? The Reds and Cards are here to stay and in a division that tough in a stadium that yields lots of home runs, is he really all that he's cracked up to be? I wouldn't pay big bucks for him with all those what ifs, and frankly, Bud Selig probably won't either, but that said, he is a decent personality for where baseball is in 2011.
They also list Josh Hamilton, and I get that for the same reason that Fielder is a decent personality for baseball 2011. I've written about that before, but frankly, just as Sizemore is an injury risk, Hamilton is a relapse risk. We've seen that before. If he shows us some discipline, we can show him some paycheck love, but frankly, he's scary to two groups: his opponents who he can just crush and his team who can lose him if he gets injured or sent to rehab. Personally, he's worth a short contract with some nice figures, but long term?
We live in a society that is currently $14 trillion in debt. This number goes up like a clock moves through the day. It just happens. Some of us want to pay it off and be fiscally responsible while others want to spend like there is no tomorrow. Some of us wonder if it can ever be paid off (I'm in that group). It almost makes me think we're trying to bankrupt China the way we did the Soviets, but alas, if we keep borrowing from the Chinese, eventually someone is going to come collecting or just declare that they own this country. It's a scary proposition and nowhere is it more true than with baseball money. The salaries are so large and ridiculous, that it's insane. I don't blame the players for taking it or even asking for it since the owners have paid for so long, but still... it's crazy.
Stores like the one out of Bleacher Report underscore the insanity that is our country's financial crisis, but that said, I like dingers when batters are hitting them into orbit, and I love strikeouts when pitchers are dropping curves from 12 to 6 to make batters look stupid.
I guess it's all a no win thing because my game won't pull in it's belt and tighten up and asses will still find their way to the seats.
As a result, we will bemoan the future of our game and wonder if Bleacher Report is on crack. We think they are, and to that, we can only offer them Whitney's advice: "Crack is whack."
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Andy Pettite
On the eve of Roger Clemens going to testify against his best buddy and steroids confidante Andy Pettite, I have to say that I have NEVER felt like Pettite was worth anything as a pitcher - especially with Hall of Fame consideration. I can remember knowing that he was coming into game 6 in the 2001 World Series, and I knew he was done for. Within 3 innings, the D-Backs were up 12-0 and were headed for that magical game 7.
I can remember hearing rumors of trading Pettite to the Cardinals a decade ago. I was so glad that he never came. First and foremost, he was a Yankee, but at best, he was a mirage propped up by the Bronx in much the same way the A's pitchers were propped up in Oakland and the Braves pitchers were propped up in their years in Atlanta.
He was never the reliable go to guy except in the years that the Yankees had nothing else to give. When he went to Houston, he was good, but he wasn't great. When it counted, they couldn't beat the White Sox, but I can't say as I remember much of that World Series since I refused to watch the battle of the Little Yankees (Clemens and Pettite vs. Contreras and El Dookie) with AJ Pierzynski thrown in for extra loathing. Sure, it was nice that the whole Black Sox thing was over and that Ozzie Guillen won one, but other than to make people understand how Shoeless Joe Jackson got screwed over, there wasn't anything to be said for that World Series other than I'm glad Pettite and Clemens steroid confusion duo didn't get rings.
Sure, he was good for a lot of innings most years, but because a person stays healthy and has an offensive juggernaut behind them and a solid bullpen after them doesn't mean that all wins are created equally. Need proof? Nolan Ryan in 1981 went 11-5 with a 1.69 ERA. How can that ERA not win every game? In his time with the Angels, he had losing seasons with an ERA just over 3.00. In 1973, 1974, and 1977, he was top 3 in Cy Young Award voting and had 16 losses in EACH season. With a winning team, he wins 30 times in each year.
But alas, we see Andy Pettite has 240 wins and we think this guy could be heading for the Hall of Fame. To that, I say, "Hooey!"
Since the Yankees are as desperate for pitching, they are positively desperate and scared stiff to bring Pettite back or find themselves going back to the late 80s and early 90s. To scare the YES Network all the more, he still can't make up his mind, and in some ways, we hope he does come back just so he can be there to get knocked around in his old age once again and come out of it without a ring.
Sure, there were those magic moments when Andy Pettite admitted his guilt in the whole Mitchell List thing, but there was something that just summed up all of his wins and that extra oomph that his average self gave. It wasn't aura and mystique.
But if a $12million from the Yankees waiting on a table believes it is, so be it. Let them believe. The division is no longer theirs. The Red Sox can say all of the right things, but the reality is that now more than ever, the ancient and aging Yankees don't have one more hurrah left in them. It's over. They're done like fried chicken.
Look at the Yankees... Chamberlain was all hype. Posada is geriatric. Burnett is over-priced and erratic. Phil Hughes is definitely not playoff ready. A-Rod is in decline. This leaves them with CC's enormous waistline... I mean price tag for an above average pitcher. The same can be said for Teixara's bat. Jeter is at the end of his run. Robinson Cano is positively dangerous. Mariano Rivera can't be counted out until he counts himself out, and well, the rest are average.
Can they compete against the Red Sox? Don't think so.
Can they compete against a young Rays team that has pride and direction and a lot of hope? We'll see on that end, but...
If the Yankees want to take their chances on the hope of Andy Pettite, just let them. It's time to see the Yankees in the cellar again, which will be BEE-YOU-TEE-FULL.
I can remember hearing rumors of trading Pettite to the Cardinals a decade ago. I was so glad that he never came. First and foremost, he was a Yankee, but at best, he was a mirage propped up by the Bronx in much the same way the A's pitchers were propped up in Oakland and the Braves pitchers were propped up in their years in Atlanta.
He was never the reliable go to guy except in the years that the Yankees had nothing else to give. When he went to Houston, he was good, but he wasn't great. When it counted, they couldn't beat the White Sox, but I can't say as I remember much of that World Series since I refused to watch the battle of the Little Yankees (Clemens and Pettite vs. Contreras and El Dookie) with AJ Pierzynski thrown in for extra loathing. Sure, it was nice that the whole Black Sox thing was over and that Ozzie Guillen won one, but other than to make people understand how Shoeless Joe Jackson got screwed over, there wasn't anything to be said for that World Series other than I'm glad Pettite and Clemens steroid confusion duo didn't get rings.
Sure, he was good for a lot of innings most years, but because a person stays healthy and has an offensive juggernaut behind them and a solid bullpen after them doesn't mean that all wins are created equally. Need proof? Nolan Ryan in 1981 went 11-5 with a 1.69 ERA. How can that ERA not win every game? In his time with the Angels, he had losing seasons with an ERA just over 3.00. In 1973, 1974, and 1977, he was top 3 in Cy Young Award voting and had 16 losses in EACH season. With a winning team, he wins 30 times in each year.
But alas, we see Andy Pettite has 240 wins and we think this guy could be heading for the Hall of Fame. To that, I say, "Hooey!"
Since the Yankees are as desperate for pitching, they are positively desperate and scared stiff to bring Pettite back or find themselves going back to the late 80s and early 90s. To scare the YES Network all the more, he still can't make up his mind, and in some ways, we hope he does come back just so he can be there to get knocked around in his old age once again and come out of it without a ring.
Sure, there were those magic moments when Andy Pettite admitted his guilt in the whole Mitchell List thing, but there was something that just summed up all of his wins and that extra oomph that his average self gave. It wasn't aura and mystique.
But if a $12million from the Yankees waiting on a table believes it is, so be it. Let them believe. The division is no longer theirs. The Red Sox can say all of the right things, but the reality is that now more than ever, the ancient and aging Yankees don't have one more hurrah left in them. It's over. They're done like fried chicken.
Look at the Yankees... Chamberlain was all hype. Posada is geriatric. Burnett is over-priced and erratic. Phil Hughes is definitely not playoff ready. A-Rod is in decline. This leaves them with CC's enormous waistline... I mean price tag for an above average pitcher. The same can be said for Teixara's bat. Jeter is at the end of his run. Robinson Cano is positively dangerous. Mariano Rivera can't be counted out until he counts himself out, and well, the rest are average.
Can they compete against the Red Sox? Don't think so.
Can they compete against a young Rays team that has pride and direction and a lot of hope? We'll see on that end, but...
If the Yankees want to take their chances on the hope of Andy Pettite, just let them. It's time to see the Yankees in the cellar again, which will be BEE-YOU-TEE-FULL.
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